The song Home by Phillip Phillips became an instant favorite of mine as I watched him win America Idol a year or so ago. The words seemed to speak so powerfully about life and how we deal with things that come our way. The reason I am choosing to write about these lyrics has to do with the transformation that they have undergone in meaning to me over this last year.

When I first listened to the song I thought it was a beautiful story of two people going through life and trouble but making the outcome their home. Ok,  this is a very shorthand description of one possible meaning. But over this last year I have been undergoing some huge transformations in my life and this song surprisingly has been along for the ride with me. For me now it is more about my higher self talking giving a loving pep talk to the part of me that gets stuck in fear, ego and worry. “Settle down it will all be clear, don’t pay no mind to the demons that fill you fear” This is a lesson that I must say has been a journey, but one that I am beginning to see the light at the end of the very long tunnel. Realizing that worry and fear get you no where has been huge in allowing myself to let go of the past and allow my true self to shine through. There are so many more points that are personal to me in this song but I think I will save that until the end!

I haven’t posted on this blog since late last year. This was mainly out of avoidance more than anything else, but I am done avoiding things I love out of the concern that I might upset someone. It is time to follow my heart and to continue to work on one of the issues that I am pretty sure we all worry about to some extent, other peoples judgement of us.

“Troubles they might drag you down, if you get lost you can be found”

I owe a lot to the amazing people who helped me find myself when I got lost over the last 3 years. Some of these people are the ones who are with me everyday but others are the “earth angels” as a dear friend of mine put it who helped bring the right people in my life at the right time. I am now at a place where I am uncovering my true self, the true self that had been covered with the troubles of the past, but now can be thankful for the challenges and see that they have helped make me who I am today. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that I have reached some sort of high enlightenment, but I have reached enough to accept things the way they occurred and to see that the future is brighter than I had given it credit before in the past. 

“Just know your not alone, I’m going to make this place your home”

I know now that I am not alone, not that I ever really was. But the people who have presented themselves in my life are so amazing that thankful is not a strong enough word for my feelings toward them. And to those that I have left behind I am just as grateful, without moving on I would have never had the opportunity to find out what true love, friendship and family truly is. I am more at home now internally and externally than ever and I look forward to where the future is taking me. I am grateful for having found true inspiration again and knowing that this is something unique that I can give to the world. I am grateful to have such amazing children who will forever be my greatest gift to the world, for they will share their bright inner selves to help the world in a way that I can’t even imagine. I am grateful to my amazing husband, who stands by me as I am uncovering who I am deep down and loves me unconditionally. I am grateful for my amazingly loyal & true friends, friends who stand by each other not just when things are good, but support each other through the hard times. And to my dearest Angela, there are no words to thank you for all you have done for me and I love you deeply!